Here we will destroy and rebuild you in our image. Don't worry. It kinda tickles.
Let's begin...

Your shift has just begun.
You feel the sudden urge to pick up a phone and call your tickets...

Reminder:
You must update your tickets within 10 minutes of the end of your shift. This ensures a seamless transition to the next tech.

ALL COMPUTERS ENTERING THE HELPDESK WILL BE LABELED WITH THE PERSONS NAME AND TICKET NUMBER.
The procedures documented herein are real.
However, any reference to actual harm--including death--is purely for entertainment purposes.